a note to my darling daughter.

Well.  Isn’t this just packed to the brim of wisdom and truth and honesty.  This may be advice for Meredith’s beautiful baby girl but, let’s face it, it’s advice for us all, however old we are.  

It’s beautiful.  Thank you Meredith: 

as i look upon the canvas of you and me and your daddy on the wall, i can’t help but remark on how much you have changed already. how much i have changed. how much you have grown. how much your being here means. how much we both have learned. how much we both still have to learn. how much we can still teach each other. i want you to know so much. this letter has been many months in the making. many thoughts are held within. many that i will forget to say. many which i do not know how to communicate. so much to say to one so small. something to look back on in many years. something that you may perhaps find helpful once you begin to navigate your own life. somewhere to begin.

you came into my world earlier than I expected. but at just the right time. you taught me in the first few days about a new love. one i had not known. one that is unparalleled. one that scares me. one that i will hold onto for dear life. one that is both challenging and easy. both heavy and carefree. both painful and healing. both weak and strong. one that is powerful.

much like you. so much power lies within you sweet one. in those big bright eyes. in those sweet little hands. within that curious little heart. power for good or for evil. power for love or for hate. power for both. power for choice.

choose wisely, sweet one. speak well and do good. work hard but play harder. take chances. be passionate. make music. travel. see as much as you can see. it opens your eyes to the world more than anything else. learn. crave knowledge.

know that you are clever and beautiful and talented. know also that there are some moreso than you. and know that that is okay. know that knowing that will make you driven. and content. know that absolutely nothing is more important than family. know also that your family extends beyond shared DNA. but also know that no one loves you like your mamma. know that no one loves you like your daddy. know that you won’t always dislike your brothers and sisters. know that people see you differently than you see yourself. know that perspective is everything.

remember that you deserve to be happy. but remember that happiness if also a choice. choose it. and remember that no amount of material ‘things’  will get you there. remember that no one is you-er than you. remember also that a mirror nor a number is the truest likeness of you. be you. remember that you make a mark on those you meet. first impressions are important. make it a good one. remember to be kind to others. remember to forgive but not always forget. remember that integrity is your greatest ally. patience is indeed a virtue. especially with yourself. remember that you are not perfect. and more importantly, remember that no one is. remember that judgement is usually misunderstanding in disguise. remember that you never know what someone else is going through. remember that a smile can help. and that laughter is indeed the best medicine. especially if induced by tickles.

so much is going on in the world, sweet innocent one. so much of the opposite of what i want for you. so much hate. so much hardship. so much suffering. so much loss. sometimes i wonder if bringing you into a world in such a state was right, the best thing for you, one who knows nothing but love and awe at this tender age. then again, i’m sure that that consideration is an affliction met by parents generations past as well. for me and many others, your being here makes the world brighter. and if it makes our little world brighter, that’s a start for the rest.

i want you to know that you are blessed beyond measure. you are loved. you are housed. you are clean. you are clothed. you are healthy. you are full. you are a citizen of not one but two countries, little girl. two countries that, compared to so very many today, are at relative peace. it is my greatest hope for you that this state shall continue and that you will feel safe in whichever is home to you at whatever time of your life. i want you to never forget those less fortunate than you. help in any way you can. but know that it isn’t just up to you. encourage others to do the same. always remember how blessed you are. and remember that with such blessing comes great responsibility. not only to yourself and those you love but, and perhaps even more importantly, to those you dislike or do not know. seek to sow nothing but peace and love and hope and acceptance. for all things good. for these are the things the world needs more of. and these are the things that reap true happiness.

be happy, my angel. grow tall. approach the world with open arms. and love hard, for you are loved fiercely. even if you forget all the rest, never ever forget that.

Categories: Becoming a Mother, Life Experience
8 interesting thoughts on this

8 Comments

  1. Alex
    Posted August 26, 2014 at 10:48 am | Permalink

    Oh wow, wonderfully written Meredith! Tears in my eyes, thank you. You had me from the go. Our LO had a somewhat difficult start in life with a first important surgery at 10 days and another completely different one at 2.5 months. He’s perfectly healthy now and is such a great joy to be around! And a great reminder to enjoy life on a daily basis. Not always easy for myself as I tend to overthink, over analyse, be a wee bit anxious. Xx

    • merashphi
      Posted August 26, 2014 at 7:06 pm | Permalink

      Hi Alex, I’m glad you liked it. I’m such a sap but it helps to get it out, you know? Sounds like you had a rough start! So did we – our little girl had surgery on day three of her life – yikes. That was hard enough – can’t imagine having to do that twice. Scary times. Very glad you’ve made it through and that your LO is doing well now. :) xx

      • Alex
        Posted August 27, 2014 at 9:34 pm | Permalink

        Yep, feels good to get it out. Scary yes, as both were unexpected. Still having some trouble letting go and not feeling guilty I couldn’t/can’t protect him when he’s a wee bit Ill/teething. I guess time will help.xx

  2. Katie
    Posted August 26, 2014 at 2:13 pm | Permalink

    Brilliant advice Meredith. Your daughter is very lucky.

    • merashphi
      Posted August 26, 2014 at 7:06 pm | Permalink

      Thanks, Katie. :)

  3. Posted August 26, 2014 at 2:39 pm | Permalink

    Meredith, this is beautiful. I’ve just become an Aunty and, while I can’t yet imagine the scale of love as a mother, your words really strike a chord with me. In the few short days she’s been alive the ‘unparalleled’ love I have felt for my darling new niece has taken me by surprise. So fierce and unexpected! I’m going to send your words to my sister, thank you xx

    • merashphi
      Posted August 26, 2014 at 7:08 pm | Permalink

      Thank you! Nieces and nephews are indeed special. It’s a very unique bond as well. I’m incredibly close to my Aunt – our daughter is named after her. :) She’s never had any children of her own so my brother and I were spoilt to bits by her growing up. It’s a lovely relationship – enjoy it! xx

  4. Posted August 29, 2014 at 7:47 pm | Permalink

    I’ve only just seen this but my word it’s beautiful – thank you for sharing it Meredith. I keep thinking about things I want to tell my baby daughter and this is spot on. Also got tears in my eyes!

    K x

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Hello! We're Clare, Aisling and Anna and welcome to a corner of the world where smart, flawed, real women talk about the bigger picture; about their experiences, stories and opinions on all aspects of being a woman today, from marriage to feminism to pretty, too.

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