Things you don’t appreciate until you have a baby.

Blow-drying your hair. Washing your hair. Brushing your hair.
Choosing your clothes based on what you feel like wearing, not on what is clean, is unlikely to ruined by being vomited on/having pureed spinach smeared into it, and vaguely fits your new, post-baby body.
Your pre-baby body.
Your body in general.  It is awesome. It can not only grow a baby, but it can keep it alive afterwards. Incredible.
Having a late night and a few drinks, and spending the following day recovering, sleeping,and eating, not singing nursery rhymes and changing nappies.
Reading a book.
Reading blogs.
Reading your own posts before posting them to check for hideous grammar/spelling mistakes/typos.
Reading anything that requires more than six seconds of concentration.
Going to the toilet without an audience.
Doing anything without an audience.
Lunchbreaks. Tea breaks. Breaks in general.
Eating with two hands.
Driving in your car. On your own. With the music turned up REALLY loud.
Your hair. It really does all fall out.
Your boobs. They really do shrink.
Being spontaneous.
Being able to coherently form sentences of longer than three words.
Writing decent posts because you have the time/brain power to, not just writing a load of bullet points and hoping that no-one will notice…
Categories: Any Other Baby, Becoming a Mother, Written By Clare
29 interesting thoughts on this


  1. Vivienne
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 7:08 am | Permalink

    *promises not to curse ever thickening and curling pregnancy hair, or bemoan buying of new bras to contain greatly enlarged bazoombas*

    Biscuits and cups of tea still exist in post pregnancy land though, right?

    • Clare
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 7:29 am | Permalink

      Oh yes. Biscuits and tea may actually be the only reason I’ve survived this far. That and gin.

      • Tracy
        Posted June 28, 2012 at 8:59 pm | Permalink

        Cups of tea do exist, I used to regularly find them on the side – cold, where I left them 2 hours ago!

    • Roz
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:54 am | Permalink

      Bazoombas made me snigger. No I’m not immature… :D

  2. Fee
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 7:19 am | Permalink

    Hair loss???

    Oh no. I think this may push me firmly towards my sickness influenced ‘Only one child’ decision!

    • Clare
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 7:27 am | Permalink

      Oh Fee, I have been there – at one point even Andy said ‘I don’t think we should have more than one’ after seeing how awful I was feeling. If it’s any consolation, the second trimester was a breeze for me….fingers crossed it will be the same for you…

  3. Fee
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 7:48 am | Permalink

    My fingers are firmly crossed! Although having ice cream as the main food I can stomach is an unexpected bonus!

  4. Posted June 28, 2012 at 8:16 am | Permalink

    Tea still exists, don’t expect to drink the whole cup while it is hot ever again though!
    My hair is still falling out and my daughter is 4 1/2 :(
    I did get to keep the lovely strong nails though :)

  5. Mahj
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 8:28 am | Permalink

    Erm, I’m with Fee – you lose your hair?!


    • Vivienne
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 8:31 am | Permalink

      More you get lots of lovely hair (all over it seems) when pregnant…..then all that extra hair falls out once the hormone wave washes over you. And possibly some more hair than that. You won’t go bald though….just feel like a moulting Old English Sheepdog

      • Zan
        Posted June 28, 2012 at 9:20 am | Permalink

        Moulting? Really?

        Am actually quite traumatised by this!

        • Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:05 am | Permalink

          Waaaaaaah, I don’t want to be an Old English Sheepdog!

          P.S. This is not an announcement, I promise!

  6. Clare
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:05 am | Permalink

    Mmhhhhmmmm…I have blocked the drains in our shower three times in the past three weeks with my hair. It all really helps with your already damaged body image.

  7. Sam
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:08 am | Permalink

    Drinking a cup of tea while it’s still hot

    NOT watching CBeebies.

    Going shopping without first having to evaluate your chosen destination for “baby friendliness” (changing facilities, places to feed comfortably, getting mahoosive pushchairs around aisles…)

    • Clare
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:24 am | Permalink

      Oh yes, the ‘is it baby suitable’ planning. Bleugh.

      ALSO – how it now takes a minimum of half an hour to get out of the door. By the time I’ve changed nappies, made up bottles, organised the bag, packed food, set the buggy up, got her in the car seat, changed my clothes because she’s just been sick down them, changed her clothes because the nappy I put on in a rush has leaked, got her back in the car seat, realised I’ve not packed the tippy cup/spare nappies/muslins, run over my toe/the cats toes with the buggy, got the car seat plugged in to the car, settled her, realised I’ve left the dummy upstairs, taken her and the car seat back inside to get the dummy, resettled her back in the car, and then left to wherever I’m going, I p’m lucky if it’s under an hour!

  8. Esme
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:12 am | Permalink

    More, please!

    And I’m with the others – no-one told me about the hair loss!!! (Again, not an announcement!)

  9. Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:12 am | Permalink

    The hair loss I’ve experienced a fair bit in the past thanks to our good friend, the pill.
    The sleep deprivation is definitely what would break me. Makes me want to cry just thinking about it!
    (ps I’m glad there have been more AOW team posts recently, especially the drivel ones, I like drivel!)

    • Sarah
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:19 am | Permalink

      Me too Amy!

      I’m scared about this baby business. I really struggle to get myself out of the door, on time, looking clean and tidy at the moment – throw a baby in and I’m not sure what will happen…

      • Clare
        Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:27 am | Permalink

        Haha – see my comment above, Sam – me looking clean and tidy is now at the bottom of my list in terms of getting out of the house.

    • Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:31 am | Permalink

      I get moulty hair during my period sometimes. Stupid hormones.

      Clare, and all the AOW Mothers, you are my heroines. I’m certain you don’t feel it but you’re bloody fabulous.

      K x

  10. Rae
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:20 am | Permalink

    Lay ins

    Sleeping in any position other than on your back because your boobs hurt

    Having anything else to talk about than the baby and how many poos they have done that day

    Doing anything with two hands

    (spot the new mum!)

    • Clare
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:25 am | Permalink

      Oh yes Rae – the leaking/blocked/infected boobs. Joy. I don’t miss that part!

  11. Clare
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:27 am | Permalink

    Oh, and I forgot to mention ‘not smelling of vomit’.

  12. Vivienne
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:40 am | Permalink

    Mmm, eau de vomit….I’d be as well put away any thoughts of smelling like Chanel again!

    • Clare
      Posted June 28, 2012 at 10:46 am | Permalink

      Yes, probably for the best. There was one particularly low moment a few months ago where I thought I would attempt to be a yummy mummy, and was in ted baker looking at a dress, wondering whether I could pull it off with my new figure…when I noticed the sales girls looking at me with their noses upturned. I assumed that it was merely that my eye bags were so bad they were offending them. Until, that was, I ran my hand through my hair, and came across a huge clump of milky vomit. Yummy mummy I was not.

  13. Celestine
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:10 am | Permalink

    Ah….but being at the other end of child-rearing, you don’t appreciate how much you love them til they leave home. Well, you do, it’s just that the letting go of them is the hardest part of having children.

  14. Becca
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 11:36 am | Permalink

    I malt anyway. My friend bought a dust buster to follow me around with. Rob despairs.

    There is still time to watch ‘don’t tell the bride’ though right?

    And my step sister in law swears by a kindle to read one handed.

  15. Posted June 28, 2012 at 12:13 pm | Permalink

    Lie ins.
    Doing a casual, stress free food shop!
    Your house not smelling of wee- nappies then potty training then wetting the bed! I’m hoping this will eventually pass and have a list of carpet/mattress cleaners should anyone need it
    Making last minute plans
    Being able to pick and choose family events more easily- suddenly your way more the property of in-laws etc who want to see the child!!
    Free time- having to ask/plan for time by yourself!!! Arrrrgh

    It’s pretty cool when they say clever things and impress people and you’re like bam! I did that!!

  16. Lottie
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 8:57 pm | Permalink

    But I bet you wouldn’t change it for the world! It must be very, very hard at the moment but your baby and you are healthy and happy and here. Not everyone is that lucky.

    Talking about hair, have you had a good haircut since with an experienced hairdresser? They might be able to offer some advice and a good chop might make you feel a little less raggedy? Perhaps hubby or a friend could take Emmi for you for an hour or two whilst you get a bit of pampering done. ALso, I’d recommend a gel manicure. It will make you feel polished even in the slobbiest of tracky bums as well as lasting for three weeks! For me, when I have a baby, once a month I will get a mani, threaded eyebrows and eyelash tint. I can look relatively good like this without doing much more than a tinted moisturiser n lip balm (eyelash tint totally necessary for my blonde lashes, if I don’t have one, I resemble a boiled egg!) However, I appreciate I am very lucky as I live in a place where these services are cheap and chips.

    I am an expat like you and I often look after friends babies when they go out for little appointments for themselves. In fact, I near enough force them out so I can get some ‘practice’ time in with baby! I hope sometime soon I will also be in their shoes.

    Good luck with it and I hope that once you hit the ten month mark, thing get easier. Five to ten minutes in the play pen for baby whilst you sip your cuppa are a mummy’s right!

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Hello! We're Clare, Aisling and Anna and welcome to a corner of the world where smart, flawed, real women talk about the bigger picture; about their experiences, stories and opinions on all aspects of being a woman today, from marriage to feminism to pretty, too.

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