I’ll get by with a little help…

Morning ladies, Aisling here with my first official post as part of Team AnyOtherWedding…I don’t know if it’s my own change in circumstance, that of Miss to Mrs; or that one of my most wonderful friends is about to become a Mummy, or that generally we all seem to be ‘growing up’, but I have been thinking an awful lot recently about how important our friendships are as we get older.

Image from Madeline via ffffound

Once upon a time, there were four 4 year olds. They bonded hard and fast over a shared love of My Little Pony and Care Bears and as the years progressed shared their Polly Pocketts, sticker books, yo-yos, Boyzone posters, Westlife CD’s, lipglosses, secrets, homework, boyfriends (!) and clothes. Break-ups, make-ups, failed exams, fashion disasters, crushes on teachers (um….yep. That was me…) and the really hard stuff that life threw ensured that these girls would grow up into their 20s as fiercely loyal to each other today as that first day in St. Gregory’s adventure playground all those years ago.

Today, two of these girls are married. One is due to give birth in 6 weeks and one has just completed her second degree. As I type, 3 of them are recovering from SERIOUS alcohol abuse whilst the fourth says a silent prayer of thanks to her unborn child. It was a brilliant night though… It was last night, that I, one of the married girls and probably the one with the
biggest headache today, took a minute to step back and think about friendships. These girls are the ones I would turn to in an instant to divulge my deepest, darkest secrets; for a hug
after a bad day; for daiquiris after a hard week. They are amongst the people in my life that I am proudest of-for Heaven’s sake, my best friend has degrees in Biophysics AND Law! They watched me walk (run like a loon) up the aisle and they helped clear up the carnage after the Wedding of My Year. I would, and I have done, drive to them in the middle of the night to make tea or to clear up broken glass or to just watch TV. I am well aware that I am very, very lucky to have people in my life that I can totally and utterly rely on and I hope that another 20 years from now the same girls will be at the end of the phone for me, in the middle of the night.

The old adage ‘Men will come and go, but your friends will always be there for you’ was one to live by in your teenage years. You would hear it from everyone, those bestest girlfriends, your parents, teachers and the girl bringing the coffee to your table in Starbucks as you sobbed into your latte over the boy in Double Science. With a few more years and heartbreaks woven into the handbag of life, however, I know those words to be untrue. I assumed Phil would be my ally, my protector, my lover, my on-call cuddle and knew he was my soulmate after just a few dates. I knew that he would be my friend-after all it helps to like someone if you’ve fallen helplessly in love with them. What I did not expect was that he would become my Very Best Friend. I couldn’t fathom that there could be another person in the world who could LIKE me as absolutely as those 3 girls who have known me and all my flaws since 1990. And yet he did. He does.

Image from leLove

Lucky, lucky Me.

Categories: Family, Friends and Relationships, Life Experience
4 interesting thoughts on this


  1. Posted September 20, 2010 at 8:32 am | Permalink

    That is so true and its only now that you have just said it that i have realized it. Because as much as my best friends since childhood are as close to me as i could possibly think my husband is closer. Gosh that's going to make me cry!
    Another great post thanks Aisling xx

  2. The Tea Drinking Bride
    Posted September 20, 2010 at 11:44 am | Permalink

    The changing face of our relationships has been something me and my girlies have discussed at length over the past few months. Since when did we all get so grown up? Buying houses, getting married, having babies….it only seems like two minutes ago we were walking barefoot after a night out singing at the top of our voices. I'm sure we could still re-enact these moments – only difference now being that then we didnt get a hangover – now we would need at least a week to recover!

  3. Posted September 22, 2010 at 4:39 pm | Permalink

    Having moved to the other side of the world (ok, so it's not that far, it just seems like it sometimes), I was nervous about feeling lonely and that not having my friends around me would affect me badly. And, actually, it wasn't easy, and I do still miss my friends. But on the positive side, it has cemented my relationship with my man. We have to be everything to each other – lover, support network, partner, and best friend. I think had we not been able to be the best friend part too, our relationship could have floundered, but we got lucky, and it didn't. That's not to say I don't still need my friends, but just that I'm lucky to have found another one, who just happens to live with me.

    Great first post Aisling love, looking forward to seeing your next one! :)


    A 'still recovering from the hen-do' Fliss xx

  4. Roz
    Posted September 22, 2010 at 10:30 pm | Permalink

    Amazing post and very well written, thanks for sharing :D xx

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Hello! We're Clare, Aisling and Anna and welcome to a corner of the world where smart, flawed, real women talk about the bigger picture; about their experiences, stories and opinions on all aspects of being a woman today, from marriage to feminism to pretty, too.

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